Friday, 11 February 2011

Rant of the Week

I was walking in town minding my own beeswax when out of nowhere some scrawny student type in one of those blue annoyingly hi-vis jackets stepped directly into my path. He tried to ask me if I was interested in paying a monthly sum to cover a charity's admin fees.

What I wanted to say (while ramming his pamphlet down his meningeal throat): "I want to punch you in the face. SOD OFF!" What I actually said (slightly louder and less cordially then I had planned): SORRY!!

When I am in town this is my pet hate. In close 2nd place is people (this tends to be women) who have no bloody spatial awareness. I once walked behind a girl who stopped suddenly, plum in my path, and turned around walking straight into me. This is rare.

What isn't rare is when I've changed my line of walk to a slightly wider line to accommodate whoever is coming the other way, they (yet again women) alter their line TOWARDS ME. My shower gel/aftershave is not THAT nice. PISS OFF!

Rant over......for this week.


Sean said...

If I ever become prime minister, along with free cider for school kids and burning down Old Trafford, I would make 'charity mugging' a criminal offence, punishable by a slow and painful death

goatman-g said...

Yes. Leave them in a deserted hotel with Jack Nicholson.